When Did You Become Like This?

Jun 18

Out of fear and envy,
this question pierced me
any hopes I had left
were now torn to shreds.

Some people seek to have
a place to burden their sad
on those who cling to hope,
determined to make the most.

While they question with self pity
“why things never work for me?”
Darling, negativity is a dark hole,
that will only consume your soul.

Chances handed on a silver plate,
but hesitation made you jump too late.
Did you ever truly want this life?
Or was the price simply just too high?

I realise now that we are too far gone,
as I mull over why and what went wrong?
But I wish to grow and I wish to go,
while you only wish for me to stay so.

As goodbyes draw closer
and we both grow older,
I promise you with a kiss
"Love, it’s always worth the risk”.

“When did you become like this?” - was a question directed at me. Whether out of curiosity, envy, fear or cheer - it really made me stop and think … when indeed did I become like this? When did I change and when did you stop changing? Is there any hope left of changing and moving forward together or was that question the answer to my own dilemma?

This is a poem of realisation, that you are on a different path, reaching a fork road in your life - the gates are closing, but you are indecisive, tied down by the obligations of love. Should you stay or should you go? You don’t wish to change them, yet you cannot wait forever. Although you can pray and try to have the best of both, one day you might have to choose, which path you’d regret not taking the most.